It’s been a month since I began boarding Detail and Playboy at a beautiful new barn and it’s freed up my time immensely. Detail is fed twice a day, Playboy is fed 3 times a day, and that’s 90 times someone else has fed my horses this past month. 90 times I didn’t have to put on muck boots or shake loose hay out of my shirt.
It’s an amazing feeling pulling up to the ranch and seeing the wonderful caretaker shoveling manure, and not me. Hiring others to care for my horses has drastically changed my days of “have-tos ” (shoveling manure, dumping manure, throwing bales of hay, raking up dropped hay, measuring grain, measuring supplements) into “want-tos” (equine coaching, grooming, riding). I get excited to drive to the ranch, and it’s liberating to come and go as I please.
I love living in Denver even more than I could have imagined. It’s surpising how quickly I’ve adapted to city life after hanging my hat on ranch life the past 3.5 years.
I’m grateful I followed my intuition to live in the country, and I learned a lot about myself during that time. I love wide open spaces and I’ll always need that in my life. I love horses and I’m passionate about equine coaching, but I’m not passionate about expending time and energy doing endless ranch chores.
I’m also dating again and I’ve come to the enlightening conclusion that I don’t need a man who loves horses and can ride. Does he need to like animals? Yes. Does he need to know how to saddle a horse or round up cattle? No. This makes the dating pool much wider.
“We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” – Joseph Campbell
My world has expanded since I moved back to Denver and it’s been a substantial change. Parts of me are coming to the surface after being dormant the past few years. The part who likes to wear dresses and has a reason to shave my legs more than once in a blue moon. Who loves to soak in a bathtub (my new home has a clawfoot tub!), and listen to Diana Krall while sipping a glass of wine. The part who enjoys hosting friends for dinner (I’m learning how to cook) and has a full-size kitchen complete with a dishwasher.
Change is scary and it’s necessary. It’s what helps us evolve and grow into the person we are meant to become. It took months of tough soul searching and abrupt wake up calls to realize my soul was calling me to expand but my ego was resisting change. I’d been limiting myself and scared to move outside my comfort zone, and away from my familiar “country horsewoman” label. That will always be a part of who I am, but it’s not all of who I am. By also embracing my inner “city woman,” I feel happier, and less confined.
“Every next level of your life will demand a different version of you.” – Author unknown
We don’t have to be one way or another….when we give ourselves permission to embrace all of who we are, we feel WHOLE.
I’d love to hear from you…do you feel like you have completely opposite sides? Share in the comments below.
The urban cowgirl,